I’m struggling today.
I’m struggling to assimilate my life with the reality of the world.
I’m struggling to be okay with it all, with accepting the things the Western world calls “important”.
I’m struggling with the judgment coming from health food advocates towards families who eat McDonalds, while they ignore the starving children in African slums.
I’m struggling with the natural birth advocates who cast judgment on moms who use epidurals, and choose to vaccinate their children, while they ignore the baby girls being literally thrown in the garbage in India, or the millions of people dying from treatable diseases in third world countries.
I’m struggling with Christians who complain about the praise and worship band singing music that’s not quite to their liking, or whining about not getting “enough” out of last weeks service, when there are men and women being shot down for gathering in simple prayer meetings.
I’m struggling with the fact that I want to spend more money than hundreds of thousands of people see in a year, on a three day vacation.
I’m struggling with the fact that I’m complaining about my family of four being cramped in a three bedroom house, when a few thousand miles away there are a dozen people sleeping on the floor in one 75 square foot shack, stomachs digesting nothing but air.
And I’m angry.
And I’m hurting.
How can we, who have so much, do so little?
I’m struggling with understanding how can we sit in church with our venti macchiatos, and say a few amens, maybe do devotions at night, and believe we are walking like Christ — I’m struggling with how I can be okay with this.
I’m angry for thinking that writing a few posts in a blog once in a while makes a difference in a world where those who are most in need of these life words cannot even read.
And I think I need to do something about it.